New Year's, 2006-Kansas City-USA
Pictured with Murshid Hidayat Inayat-Khan
Murshida Aziza Inayat-Khan
Memories of Murshida Aziza
Aziza slowly and proudly spelled out her name “A-Z-I-Z-A–!”
It was a conversation over breakfast in our home in Kansas City when she exclaimed with a demure and yet with a ‘foxy’ glint in her eye as she glanced across the table to her husband, Hidayat Inayat-Khan, “Hidayat gave me the name! It is a very special name. You can spell it backwards and forwards.”
This is just one example of how Aziza most often presented herself – at least when she was away from the public eye. She possessed great humor and wit. She had a keen intelligence. Most of the world thought of her as Murshida Aziza, the wife of Pir-o-Murshid Hidayat. Aziza did not wear a hijab, but in many ways she kept herself veiled.
Seen from another view Aziza was a working woman in Berlin decades ago. She retired from Siemens as a Research Physicist. This speaks to another kind of woman, and one that she let shine in personal interactions. A woman who was filled with self-assuredness, intelligence, humor, ingenuity, and courage. And – oh yes – a good dose of feistiness.
Hidayat and Aziza asked about how Joe and I met. After we told our story, we asked them to share theirs. They took turns talking and sharing their memories. This is what they shared with us. Vilayat and Hidayat were members of two groups of mureeds. Aziza was with Vilayat’s group, and was very insistent that the groups should meet and take a retreat together. A bus was rented and the two Khan brothers took turns driving the bus to the retreat destination.
Hidayat said, “It was my turn driving the bus, and a woman offered me a banana.” Hidayat said, “I don’t like bananas.”. The woman asked, “Well, then how about an apple?”. Hidayat went on to say that he ‘looked in the rearview mirror and he saw a woman with the most beautiful hair.” That was it! He was smitten.
After the retreat Murshid Hidayat returned to Paris and asked the secretary if she had the addresses for the members who had been on the retreat. Of course, he really wanted just to be in contact with Aziza. Once Hidayat had the address, he drove to Berlin and went directly to her home. Aziza lived with her parents at that time. Hidayat explained, “I took my courage, and I knocked on the door. Aziza opened the door, embraced me, introduced me to her parents – who warmly welcomed me, and we have been together ever since!”
Some of you may recall the many gatherings where the Inayat-Khan’s attended together. Aziza usually was content to be by Murshid Hidayat’s side during meals or social aspects of the events. She kept herself in the background during Hidayat’s presentations. If any of you had the opportunity to host this duo, or know them more personally, you know that there was a synergy between the two of them. Aziza could be ruthlessly honest, and liked people to ‘just be natural, just be normal’. She would take Murshid Hidayat to task often enough. I can still hear her say as she did so often, “Hidayat, what are you doing? Or "Hidayat, what are you thinking?”
Aziza was an extraordinary individual in her own right, and yet served The Sufi Message in the humblest of ways. She was a support and companion to her husband, Pir-o-Murshid Hidayat, a Murshida and Spiritual Mother to many, and a confidant and friend to still others.
Beloved Aziza, thank you for your living example. You will always remain in the hearts and minds of all of those who had the privilege of sharing life with you, knowing you, and loving you.
